9 year old boy: 9yo
7 year old girl: 7yo
3 year old boy: 3yo
3yo: can i come to your house?
me: yes! you are welcome anytime!
3yo: and i'm hungry at your house
me: and who will feed you?
3yo: your dad named craig will make me breakfast burritos
3yo: mia, i NEED a coke bottle gummy. it's soul for my body
me: if you don't finish your vegetables in 3 minutes, you don't get a story before nap
3yo: *stares at me for a second* (sings) shoo fly, don't bother me
*walking down the street with seven year old*
*crazy guys starts yelling at no body*
7yo: why is he doing that?
me: i don't know, let's just keep walking
7yo: he's probably... *motions drinking*... i don't like saying the word
3yo: mia, look at those flowers
me: i know, aren't they beautiful?
3yo: mia, you're beautiful
me (to 3yo): you're such a sweet little angel
7yo: yeah, an angel of H-E-L--
me: stop
*in the pool*
*3yo has a water gun*
me: don't shoot people buddy
3yo *aims water gun at my face*
me: i'm a person, don't shoot me
3yo: you're not a person
me: then what am i?
3yo: you're a girl
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